Frequently Asked Questions about applying to be CEO of RedStar Bank
Everything you ever wanted to know about running RedStar Bank. And if it isn't, use the form at the bottom to ask us directly.
What does it pay?
That depends on how much money we can raise flogging t-shirts and through pay-per-click advertising. And one or two other things we aren't talking about yet. Shhh. Keep it under your hat.
If all goes unbelievably well, we are going to pay a lump sum up front, a salary, another lump sum when we sack you after one year - and, of course, a performance-related bonus. We are aiming to offer a total package in the region of GB £500,000.
What does the job involve?
The position of CEO demands that you do no work. At all. Nothing. We are supporting Barnardos so with a little luck, the one duty you may have (if you want to) is to present them with an oversized cheque.
You can fulfil this role in your sleep, whilst watching TV, and even whilst still working in your current job.
What's in it for me?
All applicants receive personalised RedStar Bank business cards, and one (pretend) common share certificate in RedStar Bank as a thank you for joining in.
What happens next
Once your application has been processed and approved, we'll email you with the website address of your application profile. This is important, as the public will shortlist one applicant for consideration by the Appointments Committee if we get that far - until we raise £10,000, then its a beauty contest i.e. the profile with the most votes from the public gets the job.
Closing date for applications
We've decided to set the closing date for February 2012. This is to give us time to raise the money to pay the salary. The banks announce their bonuses every February and we would like to appoint someone then.
Guidelines for completing the form
You need to impress us and the public. How you do it is up to you - be clever, be funny, but above all, be interesting.
Spam, linking to irrelevant and dodgy websites, may mean your application is rejected. We'll try to keep an open mind to everything else.
Related page
The RedStar Bank CEO salary currently stands at:
and counting
figure updated quarterly
